365 DAYS

With65 DAYS

In one of Myles Munroe’s speeches, he drew a conclusion to what seems to be a thought-provoking quote: “If you were born poor, you are not the cause; but if you die poor, you are the cause.”

Anyone who thinks outside the box should be saddled with lots of meaningful, boiling, and yet unanswered questions like:

What if no one had trained me at the university? What if I were born with a silver spoon like others, and then I was a third-class citizen? What if I never had money to buy books? What if no one was willing to pay for my apprenticeship, and I had no funds to pay for it? And then, what if God had not that I should be rich?

Yes, anyone in their right senses should have all those questions to sit upon, and it should constitute their basis of ascertainment, to defend their weak, undiscovered, and unacceptable drive to propel their given potential and purpose in life.

Again, the response to the above question is presented to us in such a bulky way that we would have to pick and take hold of it, and then question even the manner of love that the Father has, that if at all He knew all these, He still impartially gives to all men just the same days in a year (365 days), not because the poor's should be increased to maybe 600 days, or maybe the rich’s should be reduced to 150 days.

And maybe He should do something about the days of a Degree Holder, to break the lines written in such a bold and unerasable inscription. But yet, it’s 365 days. Nothing more, nothing less.

Certainly, we have nothing to do about the days allocated to us than to key into the What can I do with my own equally allocated days (365)?”

THE INNER WORLD (MENTAL, EMOTIONAL, AND SOCIAL REALITY)

Identity and Belonging

Who am I becoming? : This question should be asked by someone who’s had time to think about his/her life, but fools aren’t exempted.

For girls of this century, the interpretation of this question will be: “Have I dressed like my best artist? How can I buy that gown Chinenye wore yesterday? And to the male gender, imagine the phone Chinedu came to the club with last night, he showed me his bank account, I was mad.” They are materialistic, they care less about intellectual development. And as such, their quest is to belong to the trend; this is where it has landed our society.

Who are we becoming? Does that picture of you becoming a medical doctor come so bright like when you were a child? Do you still dream of becoming an aviator? If not, then what has taken your true identity from you that you can’t even answer a “Who-am-I” question?

Now sit back, flash back to yesterday, the very last time you could recall defining your identity, and then ask yourself: Am I still in line? If not, then you need a path, you need a change of mentality.

Of a surety, “We can manage physical blindness, but we shouldn’t try to manage intellectual and spiritual blindness.” When you don’t know who you are, you cannot tell who you want to become.

We will never tell you that you are going to ride in such a smooth path, or that manna will fall from Heaven for you, NO. It took a lot of battle to deviate you from the real you; it will require a lot of battle to reunite you with the real you. Be firm, be conscious of your current state of mind.

Gender, Sexuality and Self-Expression

Gender, which implies the fact of being a male or female, has different views. This is a result of people's perception.

As Adolf Hitler, a German Nazi, would say about the female gender: “Women are nice, cute little things, soft, sweet, and stupid.” In Hitler’s dictatorial perception regarding the female gender, he saw them as irrelevant beings that can add nothing to society, and that they are used as sex toys. This view emanated from his knowledge and contact with women in a Jewish community in a certain region of Vienna: Leopoldstadt(Leopold Town) -a district is Vienna separated from the main city by the Danube waterways(the area was heavily Jewish, and considered a ghetto(Mein Kampf P.41). Their women go about the whole community doing nothing than prostituting, satisfying the sexual urge of Jewish plutocrats and the likes. Hitler generalized everything and came to the conclusion that women should be called what they are (bitch). Well, that’s for Hitler, and maybe some other sect. 

If I should be specific, pointing fingers at the female students, I would ask- Are you what they say you are? Are you among those girls who believe they can’t change the world just because they are of the female gender?

Did you find yourself in a family where your parents will say it straight, “We are done with you, we can’t waste our resources on you", and the next thing you hear is, "She will get married and we will lose all that we’ve invested in her”? Have you ever felt sad when nothing positive seems to come out of you just because you are a girl? How then do you express yourself? As an inferior being, or as a powerful being that can rewrite narratives! Many girls/women have addressed this question both positively and negatively. 

And for the male folk, maybe you have a dull brain that makea s you think you can’t make it in your academics. You can! It’s just your mindset.

How do you want to address it? The power is within you!

Fitting In / Standing Out

In our previous discussion on the sub-heading: Gender, Sexuality and Self-Expression — we concluded with a rhetorical question: How do you want to address it? Do you want to fit into the generally acceptable perception of your gender, or are you going to stand out from among them and make a difference?

Henry Ford stood out! Today, his brand (Ford) is one of the best in the automobile industry.

Ryan Holiday stood out! Today the world is reading him.

Chimamanda Adichie stood out! Today she is doing it well in the literary sphere.

I charge you this day, never fit into that claustrophobic situation you find yourself in, and never dance to the negative impressions people have about you.

If the world figures mentioned above could do it, then you can.

LOVE, FRIENDSHIP, & EVERYTHING BETWEEN

“Actively rebel against those forces that have pushed you away from your true path.”

                                                                                                                — Robert Greene

What Makes a Real Friend?

What makes a real friend is the ability to see from your friend’s perspective and to bear each other’s burdens. This is what defines a real friend. That is to say, "the people you mingle with, the friends you keep, have certain power or control over what you want to be or the height you can reach in life".

So, what kind of friend(s) do you keep? The truth is, S/he will make or mar you.

Crushes, Dating & Boundaries

“Because a child has grown or developed biologically does not denote psychological advancement.”

Because you have, at this level of your self-life, entangled yourself with all manner of acts and crappy deeds, does not mean you know the necessary boundaries or emotional maturity required for meaningful relationships(Dating, as we may put it).

To the youths (students), what they call love is loss. And it's in the brain, not in the heart. That is why you will see a pretty girl who used to do well in class suddenly dropping academically because a small parasite(boy) she wants to impress or is crushing on is around, and he has promised her the universe.

I may not be wrong to say that right here, some of us have already found all we want to spend the rest of our lives with. And yet, there are so many things to do with our lives, and we have done nothing.

Can I shock you? That boy or girl you are dying for today is as confused as you are. Therefore, if you are confused and he is confused, then both of you are riding yourselves to destruction.

Please build emotional boundaries and save yourself. Utilize your 365 days.

Dealing with rejection and heartbreak:

Basically, I believe that the reason people feel disappointed and heartbroken is because they expected so much from the ones who leave them heartbroken. Notice that rejection and heartbreak can come from any angle: family, friends, society, and even the church.

Maybe your parents have spent so much money on you academically, and yet you have nothing upstairs to show for it. Or maybe that person who promised you a luxurious life on the moon has found another cockroach in his cupboard, and so you are outdated.

All this destabilizes your soul because you expected too much from them.

The best way to live above rejection and heartbreak is to expect them and embrace them at their arrival. Trust me, they won't move you. So be focused on that dream, chase it until it's yours!

SEASONS OF CHANGE

Friendship in Flux

As teenagers grow and evolve, so do their friendships. Changes in values, interests, and even schools can cause rifts or new connections to form. It's important to recognize that outgrowing a friendship is not a failure, it is a sign of personal growth. Strong friendships adapt to these changes, becoming deeper and more meaningful, while others fade to make room for new, more aligned connections. 

Friendship in flux challenges us to learn emotional resilience and healthy communication.

Friendships often evolve as we grow, experience new things, and develop new perspectives. This period of change can sometimes lead to drifting apart from old friends and building new connections. While this transition can be unsettling, it offers a chance to form more meaningful relationships that align with who we are becoming.

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” – C.S. Lewis

As teens grow and navigate different phases of life, the people around them shift. Friendships once based on proximity or common classes may fade, making room for deeper bonds formed through shared values, interests, and emotional support.

Finding Identity Through New Interests

Teen years are often filled with exploration. From joining clubs to discovering new hobbies or diving into different music and fashion trends. These interests become the building blocks of identity. Whether it's discovering a passion for digital art, environmental activism, or creative writing, such interests create space for self-expression and confidence. They also introduce teens to communities of like-minded individuals, strengthening their sense of belonging.

Trying out new hobbies, sports, clubs, or artistic expressions allows teenagers to explore who they are and who they want to be. New interests can ignite passion and reveal hidden talents. They can also serve as safe spaces to express individuality.

“The only way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” – Mahatma Gandhi

This season of change offers a powerful opportunity to step out of comfort zones, broaden perspectives, and discover identity through trial and error.

Prom Season: Hype, Anxiety, and Self-Image

Prom season is often portrayed as a glamorous rite of passage. While it brings excitement and joy, it can also trigger anxiety about appearance, acceptance, and expectations. Teens may feel pressure to look a certain way or be part of a specific social scene, which can affect self-esteem.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s important to remember that prom is just one night. True confidence comes from being authentic and valuing inner beauty and self-worth over societal standards.

Travel, Escape, and Self-Discovery

Travel, whether far away or just a short distance, allows young people to step out of their usual environment and see the world from a new perspective. It encourages self-reflection and growth. Travel isn't just about physical movement; it’s about emotional and mental escape, offering a break from routines.

“Not all those who wander are lost.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

During such times, teens may discover new passions, embrace cultural diversity, and gain a deeper understanding of themselves and their place in the world.

Redefining Relationships with Family and Friends

As teens mature, their relationships with family and friends often shift. Boundaries may be re-evaluated, and communication styles evolve. They may seek more independence while also realizing the value of emotional support from loved ones.

“Family is not an important thing, it’s everything.” – Michael J. Fox

This redefinition can be both challenging and enriching. Open dialogue, empathy, and patience from both sides can strengthen these bonds and help build lasting relationship based on mutual respect.

PRESSURE POINTS

Academic Pressure and Expectation

In the world of teenagers, few things loom larger than the expectations tied to academic success. Schools, parents, peers, and even society at large often present education as the singular pathway to future stability and success. While this emphasis has its merits, it can also weigh heavily on young shoulders.

From early morning classes to late-night study sessions, many teens live in a cycle of assignments, tests, and the silent (or vocal) pressure to always do more. Grades become more than letters on a page, they start to feel like judgments on one's worth. The competition for scholarships, admission into top institutions, or simply not disappointing family members adds layers of stress that are often hidden behind a composed exterior.

Unfortunately, the push for perfection can cause teens to fear failure, develop imposter syndrome, or engage in unhealthy comparisons with peers. The pressure doesn’t always come from external sources, some teens internalize high expectations and become their own harshest critics.

“Don't let schooling interfere with your education.” – Mark Twain

"I feel like I can’t breathe during exam season. It’s like my future depends on one week." – Grace, 16

Mental Health: Anxiety, Burnout, and Coping

With academic expectations, social pressures, and the complexities of growing up, many teens face mounting mental health challenges. Anxiety and burnout are increasingly common among adolescents, especially in a fast-paced digital age where comparison and overexposure are only a scroll away.

Anxiety can show up as constant worrying, physical symptoms like headaches or stomach aches, and an inability to focus. Burnout, on the other hand, results from prolonged stress, leading to emotional exhaustion, reduced motivation, and even physical fatigue. These feelings are not just “a phase”, they're real mental health concerns that deserve attention and care.

Causes may include:

• Excessive academic workload
• Lack of sleep or rest
• Social media comparison
• Unrealistic expectations (from self or others)
• Lack of coping mechanisms or support systems

The good news? Coping is possible. Building emotional resilience, creating healthy routines, and having access to a safe support system: whether it's friends, family, a counselor, or a trusted teacher, can make a significant difference.

Coping Strategies:

• Time Management: Break big tasks into small, achievable goals.
• Mindfulness Practices: Breathing exercises, journaling, or meditation can help calm anxious thoughts.
• Digital Detox: Step away from screens to reduce overstimulation and negative comparison.
• Talk it Out: Speaking to a mental health professional or a trusted adult can ease the emotional load.
• Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection: Learn to value growth over flawless outcomes.

“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you.” – Dan Millman

Teenage years are a season of intense growth, and with growth comes pressure. It's okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes. What matters is learning how to navigate these challenges with grace, support, and self-compassion. Teens must be reminded: You are more than your grades. Your well-being matters.

THE POWER OF ONE YEAR

How much can change in 365 days? 

Since the rich and the poor, young and old, male and female, are given just the same number of days in a year, what can really change in mind? A lot can change, "immeasurable". Let's just expand on one thing that can really change: your mindset.

Are you so drowsy by your own negative self-perception that nothing positive moves you? Or have you concluded already that since you did not go to the university, your friends who did are better than you?

Give the above question a thought. There are so many unemployed graduates scattered all over the nation, and a good percentage of the few jobs created seem to be the initiative of school dropouts. That is to say, it's not in the degree; it's in the mindset.

Therefore, there is no measure of what you can change in 365 days. Remember, if you don't have a degree, you have a talent, that's enough backup!

 Encouragement to keep going, growing, and glowing.

When you stop going, you stink. When you stop growing, you stop seeing tomorrow. When no glowing reports are given about you, then there are things not done right. Look for that enemy and kill it at once.

"If you are born poor, you are not the cause. But if you die poor, you are the cause". -Munroe Myres

"To whatever you can become, ego is the enemy" --Ryan Holiday

"Actively rebel against those forces that have pushed you away from your true path". -Robert Greene.

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Article written by Marvelous Agbroko and E. L. Teddy