WHEN ELDERS TALK

 

WHEN ELDERS TALK

I was 18 years old, while he was already 80. My grandpa was a very lovely and caring man. An octogenarian, you wouldn't want to go a day without wanting to sit at his feet just to hear him talk about life. 

Right from my childhood days, I had always wanted to be with him, if not for other things. For the folk tales that always left us thinking as we mirrored the past, and wished we were there, and sometimes wished we weren't.

Baba Yion(John), as he was called, was a very tall man. In fact, he was the tallest man in the whole community, and he had a fearful appearance(Nephilim in nature), but he never abused his mysterious size, as some today will capitalize on that to intimidate others. There are things I would do, and he would just look at me and smile. Sometimes, this could be those things he was supposed to have gotten mad at me.

But as I progressed in life, I started asking myself some questions. "Is this lifestyle synonymous with elderly people?" I ask myself this question because I know a friend of his who used to behave the same way. Or "is it that old men don't beat?"  Well, a day came when all these questions were answered. After the answer, my legs became weakened, my eyes grew dim, and light again as he blended the truths and gave me a cupful to drink, something so chilled but difficult to empty the cup.

That faithful day, it dawned like every other day. I woke up early in the morning, remained in my room, fondling my phone for about one and a half hours or so. I was in my room when a friend came, dashed into my room, and asked me to accompany him somewhere. A request I did not decline. My grandma was in the backyard with my sister whom I was two years older than, Preparing breakfast.

I quickly sneaked out with my friend who told me he wouldn't waste time, that he just wanted to deliver a message to someone. But when we went out, the plan changed. We visited places that were not in the initial plan. Guess what? I finally returned home by 12.44pm.

Immediately I entered the house, I discovered that the atmosphere wasn't clement/mild, as both my grandma and grandpa looked me eyeball to eyeball until I entered my room. They did not even respond to my greetings. Right inside my room, even conscience, my very conscience, handcuffed me. And whilst still in the ocean of regret for my action, I heard a very deep voice calling my name. That was my grandpa.

I went out of my room in response to the call. When I got to the veranda where my grandparents were seated, I saw two additional chairs. While I believed one was for me, the other was maybe for my sister. Though I was still thinking why she would be in attendance at a meeting I knew was to address my nonchalant attitude. Well, I may not have been right, but I was.

My grandpa offered me one of those chairs and summoned my sister to take the other one. It was when we both sat down, and my grandpa started talking, that I discovered that neither of us had been in the house since morning. But where did my sister go? I thought I heard her voice in the morning in the backyard with Grandma. Yes, truly I did, but something happened.

Grandpa started, you woke up this morning, neither cared to do any house chores nor did you reach anyone to say good morning. Anyway, that's not the matter. The matter is that you left the house without anyone knowing of your whereabouts. Perhaps you had planned to arouse our blood and give us hypertension.

That wasn't enough. We asked your sister to check your friend's place in case you went there. She went and did not return again, she did that so that we shed tears because we have grandchildren, right? 

That was when I knew my sister's offense. In fact, from my grandpa's words, it was clear that she returned 30 minutes before I did.

He continued, " You see? Life is so sweet, but it does stink". All these beautiful things you see out there aren't so beautiful when you go close as they appear from afar.

Iwat, as he used to call me. Sometimes, when I look at you, when you exhibit certain character, or you do something wrong, I smile. That's because you remind me of a time when I was like you. I only saw the beauty of the world from a distance, just like you do now. And what you should know is that no one talked to me about it the way I do now. And the more reason you should be different from me when I was your age is that you have had something, something transformative. Trust me, if you fail to live according to that which you have learned today, you will fail your generation tomorrow.

Iwat, interpreted to mean: "grey hair" in the Efik language, literary means: the child of my old age, as Joseph was to his father(Jacob). If you follow friends and trends and impregnate someone's daughter, there will be a time when you will go deep inside the mangrove to fish. And there may come a bad day when you can't boast of a catch. Others around you will change their minds and advise that you go to the house because the water is not good. But you won't because you know that without you going back to the house with something, you won't be able to enter it. And I tell you, you will raise a child whose neck is as small as that of an ant, the size that my fingernail can cut. My son, advise yourself if you don't want to grow old at 25.

I sat there listening to him as his advice sank into not just my body, but also my spirit and soul. 

Okay, so this is why they don't talk or rant, I said to myself. The word that came out of him pierced deep into my bone marrow, as if someone used a whip on me. Grandpa's approach to caution was such that he gave you all you needed to succeed and allowed you to choose which worked best for you or which line you wanted to toe.

Before I could close my eyes and open them, he was done with me. He turned to my sister and said, Ima, meaning "Love" in the Efik or Ibibio language. You think you are small? No, you aren't. Even if you were, have you discovered that hawks don't hunt the mother hen? They hunt the chicks. You see all these vibrant young men around? They won't hunt my wife again. They are coming for you. And if you think you aren't developed biologically, then I would advise you to go to the Hausa land and see girls of your age who are first wives controlling five other women in their husband's house.

You are so beautiful in their eyes today, but I hope Grandma told you that you won't be that beautiful in their eyes again when you get pregnant and that you won't have fans or followers anymore. Well, that's the truth. 

My daughter, should in case you have the wisdom of a tortoise, remember to ask the same doctor who helps you flush it out to also show you the one to take when you want to take in.

He ended his words there, took his staff, and walked inside. We stayed there for 30 minutes. We could not move or say anything.

If you are fortunate enough to read this message today, thanks to God! You just received words of wisdom. Please do well to comment: let's hear your opinion. Share, and subscribe for more insightful articles/Contents.

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